havent been sleeping well at all... pissing the shit out of me srsly. how do i get better sleep?
and becos ive been watching alot of horror movies lately, i havent been able to sleep without the lights on. which makes me even less well-rested. damn sad. wish somebody would accompany me to sleep.
i brought a cardigan that was way too thin for freezing cold temp offices. so i came home with a very bad flu. and i went to sleep after having a bar of chocolate.
woke up washed up brushed my teeth. lazy to cook myself instant noodles. and lazy to brush teeth again after that so now im hungry. but at least i took a nap jez now so im not tired. that isnt entirely good either cos i should be sleeping so that id wake up in abt 7 hrs to feel a lil bright and sunshiney.
aint happening man... im going to paint my face when i go to work later. feeling so fugly lately. tmr's tuesday... bz day ahead. need to pick myself up and be hyper and all. i think i spent my hyperness over the weekend with bf but all he does is drain the life out of me. energy level sibeh srsly low right now. being very honest here... the only good thing is that i can sleep like baby at his plc. but now im back home all alone i cant sleep on my tiny bed with my stupid shitty pillow and a not so warm comforter and with no one beside me.
my bed smells funny. i want a maid. now.

when im there all i can think about is the cold and what i can do in that room.
it's kinda like a mental asylum without the padded walls.
very interesting, im missing my cubicle b4 bedtime.
7 more hrs or so.
my room seems all too cheerful for me now.
(my room is very very bimbotic HAHA)
nightnight.
sweet dreams.

im loving this sweet relief.
i just might not have to care anymore.
:)

ive got the sniffles and the invisible pimple on the side of my nose refuses to go away.
im in alotta pain whenever i wanna sneeze or rub and blow my nose or even wash my damn face.
and i cant even locate the effing pimple.
anw hi hello there, my weekend was sad, to say the least.
sad not like a emo-sad but like a pitiful loser sad.
i dont know how to handle a life so simple and stupid and boring.
i feel empty and it's as if im living somebody else's life.
my bf makes me feel crappy, but i cant do anything that makes me feel better lest i make him feel crappy or break my promises or whatever. SO F***ING LAME.
as much as i lament about it, i still havent gathered enough frustrations to smash him into lil bits and pieces. or actually even talk about it.

like a wild animal that has been put in captivity and domesticated. yes that feeling.

gossip girl damn shiok.
chuck is the ultimate bf.
sigh.............................................
im depressed hahahaha.

matt from ugly betty is so cute i just wanna kiss him.
i love vulnerable guys. ahhahaa or not. maybe just ocassionally vulnerable guys.
anw dudes, i need to stop being so boring.
i need to do sth that makes me feel alive!!!
cant wait for the holiday next week.
i think i really need it. (even though i know what i need exactly is not be working in the ofc.)
actually im quite scared to be going somewhr so foreign with this dude sia aka as my bf.
i hate relying on people i cant trust. ahahahaha. in this case i only have one person to count on. cb. at least when we're in msia it's ez to make my way home. cab/bus/plane my choice.
why cant we just go to bangkok or shenzhen/hongkong. i am damn familiar with the plc!
then i wouldnt b very lost if i decide to kick his ass. sigh. so stressful to go on holiday also.
sekali like geok said, two person go three persons come back. ahahahha.
the third person is none other than a vietnamese bride, not a baby fyi.
shall go and google and learn some vietnamese phrases like "i am lost" or sth.
it's friday yay.
i am going to nua for today and party hard tmr night.
sighzzz.

morbid entry.
my dad is turning 50 years old next year.
i only have about 10-20 years more with him before he becomes bones and ashes.
everyone except my ah ma died before they turned 70.
so im just kinda estimating his lifespan haha zzz.
so depressing.
slogged his whole life.
separated from his family.
he was jez tellin me that he wants to work a few more yrs before resting for good.
so if you do the math, for like 20+ yrs he works. retires for like 10+ years and that's that.
woah that is just frickin bullshit.
-angsty teen mode-

ever since i started work, tuesday is the busiest day of my week.
we have our weekly division training every tuesday.
and i like it. cos time passes quickly.
other days are quite draggy. being in the office all by myself in that little corner.
but there’s no way that my office should be filled with people cos that would mean they are not out for viewings = no potential clients to entertain = no biz.
i try to make myself as bz as i can so that 6pm will come soon.
im quite sure this is not the right attitude and style of a working person.
-shrugs-

071109:
adrian’s 21st birthday celebration.
felt quite bad cos i arrived only when the party ended due to weird sleeping habits…
managed to have desserts with the grp at sgoon gdns though. :)
after which, i went to jeannine's hse for gambling+drinking session.
just like the good old days.
had damn goodaglio olio pasta cooked by her dad. havent had tt in a year or so.
shiok...

bored in adrian's car.

dessert shop at sgoon gardens. apparently the food sucks.
but my mango pudding (safest choice) was good.

my darlings.

061109:
kinda-healthy friday night out with jaljal.
we went to overeasy finally to have the supposedly very good burgers.
it was really quite good. the fries were yummylicious.
went to kbox at marina sq aft dinner... not butter! :(
depressing but it's okay at least we get to sing song.
sang for awhile and we went hm like before 3am, 2 berry good kids.







p.s. my camera damn sucky.
but i cant buy anything for the next 2 months.